The Naked Viscount by Sally MacKenzie

Garlic lovers! It’s time to stand up and be heard! It’s time to let authors know that we are not going to take it anymore! Garlic lovers are nice people, they like little bunnies, and cats… they are not all E-V-I-L!!!!

Just finished The Naked Viscount by Sally MacKenzie… where to begin? Well, let’s begin here with a question: Why don’t heroines take enough reading material to bed when they turn in? Don’t they know whether the book they are reading will last through the night? I know I’m always aware of when I’m going to finish, hence, I always have a spare. This of course means I don't have to wander to the library in old ratty transparent nightdress.

Another question - why does a hero (Edmund) always argue with the heroine (Jane) about whether or not she is going to go with him every... single... time they get ready to solve the next clue in the mystery? Give up already! The heroine is going with you. That's why she's the heroine.

Another question: why do silly aunts have ridiculous animals? And a talking bird who can conjugate verbs with the best of them!!! Puleeeeze!!!

More questions: Is it really that important that you don’t die a virgin? And would your ick factor kick in if you saw a portrait of your father, spread-legged and naked!!! EEEWWWW

Why do heroes have aching members? You’d think there would be something they could do about that. And do aphrodisiacs really work… not once… but twice? And, freckles… did you know if you have them on your butt, you are a bad woman, but on your nose it’s adorable?

Now, let’s ponder villains. Just once I’d like to have a handsome villain with sweet breath in a novel. Why do villains have dirty, crooked, yellow teeth? (Aside from the fact that most people back then had dirty, yellow, crooked teeth, that is.) Why do they have fat lips and why does their breath always smell of garlic? Why is that a bad thing? Garlic is good for the heart!!!

So there you have it in a nutshell: if you read The Naked Viscount, all of the things questioned above and more, will be there for your perusal. And, you will also have the thrill of a heroine who runs around yanking plaster protrusions off of Pan statues. Yes, she defaces art! Yes, once again, I was disappointed in a comedy that wasn’t funny. You know, I’m thinking if the villains in this book had been over the top (think Jack Lemmon in The Great Race or Dennis Farina in Get Shorty), then I think this book would have been humorous.

Since I have the series, I’ll be buying the next one, I just hope the next one in is better.

Time/Place: Regency England
Sensuality Rating: Hot


Tracy said...

lol! omg that was funny. All very good questions indeed.

And yes, if I saw a portrait of my father naked and spread eagle my ick factor would kick in and I would run for the freakin hills! lol

Katiebabs/ KB said...

all the mention of naked statues and certain parts falling off into the heroine's hands became a bit ridiculous.