The Highlander's Irish Bride by Vanessa Kelly

August 23, 2021

Another Scottish tree trunk.

https://www.vanessakellyauthor.com/
I have to ask, are Scottish men really so big? In most all of the historical Scottish Romanceland books I’ve read, the male Scots seem to tower over everyone. I’ve been to highland games. I haven’t noticed a slew of giants wandering around the tents. So, I did some googling. Much to my surprise, I found information that said…yes, they used to be big. Once upon a time, male Scots were the biggest European men around. They used to be 6’ or more, but hey…things have changed. Thanks to junk food, they’re now just like all the other 5’10” guys wondering around. I guess the Scots in the books can still be tree trunks, just not the ones walking through my neighborhood.

Anyway, The Highlander’s Irish Bride, by Vanessa Kelly, is the fourth book in the Clan Kendrick series. Kathleen Calvert is the troublesome heroine, and Grant Kendrick is the stodgy hero. I have not read any of the books in the series, but I may after reading this one. Evidently Grant wasn’t always such a stick in the mud. He and his twin brother used to cause all kinds of trouble. But now, he’s turned over a new leaf, he’s alllll business…no longer running wild. And, his family is worried about him. Evidently, the Kendrick family can never be happy. They were disturbed when Grant was a wild lad, and now they're disturbed when he’s a responsible man. There’s just no winning with this family. In a rather convoluted, contrived plot, Grant is put in charge of escorting Kathleen Calvert to a Scottish estate somewhere in a Scottish forest. Kathleen wants to go to Ireland where the grass is green, because Scotland doesn’t have green grass, or hills, or mountains. There is a bit of a tug-o-war between Kathleen and Grant.

There seemed to be a whole lot of characters connected to other books in this story. Every time someone was mentioned, I had to go to Fantastic Fiction to look their names up. It seemed to me that Ms. Kelly may have connected all of her books. In order for me to find out, I would have to spend a lot of time googling, or reading all of her books. I haven’t made up my mind yet which one I will do. Anyway, there are several characters in this story that are from previous books. While this story is a standalone book, knowing that a plethora of characters had their own stories was a distraction. I’m not fond of distractions in my books.

Road trip. So, wild Kathleen and boring Grant are on the road to Scotland, or Ireland, depending on who has the upper hand. They have adventures on the way to the green hills. There are thieves and villains’ all over the place. I liked Kathleen and Grant. They balanced each other out. Tooooo bad the story didn’t focus more on them. Let’s talk about what drew me out of the story: Angus and Jeannie.

Angus and Jeannie. The difference between a good secondary characters, and an irritating secondary characters. This book has them both. One adds to the story, and one drags the story down. Let’s start with the character who added to the story: Angus. I love characters who are fun. And yes, comedy is subjective. I believe it’s even harder to read comedy. When we watch a funny movie, we see the humor…usually. But to read comic words on a blank page, and pick up on the author’s intend, that’s hard. When I’m presented with a character who makes me smile, and on occasion laugh, I’m impressed. When it came to the eccentric Angus, I chuckled. He made me happy. The author succeeded in conveying written “fun.” Then, there was Jeannie.

Has anyone ever seen the 1956 movie, The Bad Seed? While Jeannie didn’t drown anyone, or burn anyone up in a bunch of excelsior, Jeannie was nonetheless really irritating. You know, irritating is an interesting word. It doesn’t really express my feelings for Jeannie in The Highlander’s Irish Bride. She was more than just spoiled, more than just a brat, but just not quite a bad seed. No one seemed able to discipline her, or even care what she was up to. I see her future life full of tap-dancing on someone’s forehead.  She was a despicable character. She was a character who wasn’t written with any redeeming qualities. Jeannie was a bigggg negative to the narrative of the book. When I was finished reading this story, I didn’t remember how lovely the romance was, or how Angus made me laugh.  No, what I remembered most was how insufferable Jeannie was.  That’s not what I want from a romance.

Bottom line. Sweet romance, funny grandfather, detestable sister.

Time/Place: Road Trip Scotland

Sensuality: Warm

Romance: B-

Angus: A-

Jeannie: F

A Midsummer Nights Romance by variety of authors

June 14, 2021

All together now - Shakespeare - AAAAAkkkkkk

Why do I keep reading books that refer to Shakespeare? I don’t know! Someone stop me…puleese! What an overrated playwright! I'm in a mood - especially when it comes to classical "male" writers.

There are 15 short stories in A Midsummer Night’s Romance, and as you might guess from the title, they are all tied to Midsummer Night’s Dream. Actually, it’s a masquerade ball that the stories are tied to, but you have to come as your favorite Midsummer Night’s Dream character. Tapping my chin…do I have a favorite character from Dream?  Maybe, Puck. He seems to be the only one in the whole play in control of anything. Since there are 15 short stories, I will attempt to make short comments on each story.

1.  Season of Scandal, by Alyssa Alexander. http://www.alyssa-alexander.com/
This is about a couple who were in love when they were teenagers, promised each other stuff that teenagers wouldn’t be able to do. Then he went his way to the military, and she was left behind, and could never forgive him. They meet at the ball, in disguise, don’t recognize each other, quote Shakespeare, play finger puppets, unmask, get mad at each other, and quote more Shakespeare. Warm – C

2.  A Kiss for Luck, by Jennifer Ashley. https://jenniferashley.com/
Another meeting at the ball, which extends beyond that initial meeting. Not too many misunderstandings, charming hero, and delightful heroine – B+

3.  Love Disguised, by Grace Burrowes. https://graceburrowes.com/
Why does one go to a party if one wants to avoid society? Rupert and Marie are disguised as servants, not sure why. They are actually engaged to each other, but don’t know each other. This was a fast, clean romance. B-

4.  Until You, by Gina Conkle. https://ginaconkle.com/
The beginning of this story reminded me a little of the beginning of Lord of the Scoundrels. Emma is fascinated with Intaglios, and Rufus has one he wants investigated. At the party, she thinks he is disguised as a servant, but actually he is a working man. He is also the illegitimate son of a duke. However, at the end of the story, he doesn’t magically change into a Duke. Much to my surprise, Emma and Rufus find their happily ever after in Italy, as part of the working class. Clean – C+

5.  Ill Met by Moonlight, by Eileen Dreyer. https://eileendreyer.com/
Well, it had to happen, an engaged couple who don’t know each other at a masquerade party.  Should be interesting since they don’t know each other, and they are in disguise. This is the first appearance of someone dressed as Nick Bottom (say donkey head). We have Anastasia and Hugh. She’s short, there are a lot of short women in these stories. I don’t have a problem with it, unless it’s used to diminish the character, and I think we have a little bit of that going on in this story.

Light bulb moment! A light bulb went off while I was reading.  There seemed to be something familiar. Something just out of reach. Then it dawned on me. Bridgerton!  I started to wonder if some of these authors were watching Bridgerton while they were writing.  This one has the heroine slugging a bonehead male before the hero can save her. Just pondering.

Anyway, nice hero in this story. He gives the heroine some space to decide whether she wants him. Oh, by the way, there is a rather charming end to the book, when the hero appears at the wharf in a donkey head. Clean – B-

6.  She Walks in Scandal, by Elizabeth Essex. https://www.elizabethessex.com/
Another small woman, and a really horrible father. Violet’s father is forcing her to marry, of course she doesn’t want to. She’s got plans! Don’t all Romanceland heroines have plans? Her plan involves her fencing teacher. There was an awful lot going on in this story. Horrible families galore! She has a horrible father!  He has a horrible father! He’s also has bonehead step-brothers and a downtrodden mother. He wants to marry Violet, but he has no money, and he’s not of her class. There was way too much going on in this story, especially when one considers the word count. There is a silly let’s-solve-our-problem-with-a-sword-fight moment. There is also a mighty convenient “save” the heroine and hero ending. There was too much going on for this story to succeed. Clean – C-.

7.  The Awakening of Lady Flora, by Bronwen Evans. https://www.bronwenevans.com/
This one has a woman who will never luv another man because her husband was just soooooo wonderful. But she will take on a paramour. Which is why she’s at the masquerade. Our hero, James, has loved Flora forever, and ever. He has a lot of guilt because her husband was his bestest friend. Now, he must fight the ghost of his friend and win the woman he has luved forever. There is a dumb Romanceland plan in this story. There is another woman who wants James, but when she can’t have him, she tricks James and Flora into a compromising position…and James and Flora marry. According to her, that was her plan alllll along. If she can’t have James, Flora can. This story reminded me of some of the over-dramatic old novels…jealousy, conniving, lying…over the top drama. And, the epilogue…we get to hear the other woman’s Romanceland plan recap. This was a real groan story (and, not in a good way). Warm – D-

8.  One Enchanted Evening, by Anna Harrington. https://www.annaharringtonbooks.com/
At last it happened! A story in which I said to myself, “this really needed to be longer.” Great couple, a wonderful child, and a scene stealing dog – Rufus. The hero is the neighbor to Lord and Lady Whitwell. The Whitwell’s are the one throwing the masquerade party. Evidently, they are the neighbors from hell, cause our hero is not happy. Anyway, I wanted more from this couple: Mason and Nora. They were delightful, and their story of their romance was wonderful. Warm – A-

9.  Her Wildest Dreams, by Jade Lee aka Kathy Lyons. https://kathylyons.com/
This one is about a half-Chinese woman, who also happens to be illegitimate, and is trying to fit into English aristocracy. This one has a blackmailing bonehead character who tells his family he is going to marry the heroine…unless they give him some money. Our hero, Lord Turrock, the cousin of the bonehead is sent to chase the heroine away. The good thing about this book, is that the heroine realizes that she needs a man to survive the world she lives in. The bad thing, there was a lot of heavy-handed prejudice scenes. The romance was relegated to the back seat, and the epilogue was non-existent. I’m sure there are short stories which can address the injustice perpetrated on a race of people, but this one didn’t succeed. The romance was lost amongst verbiage. I also think there should be a law that requires allllll authors of short stories to include an epilogue. Clean – C-

10.  Unmasking the Earl, by Madeline Martin. https://www.madelinemartin.com/
Another Bridgerton moment! Remember the “call me by my name” dance scene? Remember Simon’s hand between Daphne’s shoulder blades? Guess what’s in this story? Yep, you guessed right. Those manly man fingers gliding up the back while our couple dances. Which reminds me, I have a question about rakes. Do innocent women really know what a rake is, and what rakes do? How can they accuse the guy of being a rake, if they don’t know anything about the mechanics of a Timothy Toad, and his finger puppet friends? I digress.

This story has Lord Chambrook and Cecelia, and many characters who will have their own books. There’s a silly misunderstanding with another woman. Unmasking the Earl  should not have been in a short story. Warm/hot B-

11.  A Prince in the Pantry, by May McGoldrick. https://www.maymcgoldrick.com/
This one was almost a wallbanger. Can a book full of short stories be a wallbanger? I guess one could always skip a story one doesn’t care for. Pondering. Anyway, this one has a woman who has a father in debtor’s prison. She was once part of the aristocracy, but now she is a servant. Pearl Smith is her name. All of her ex-friends belittle her, bully her, degrade her, because they are all better. She just hates English society. Coming to her rescue is Prince Timour Mirza from Persia. He is pretending to be a servant. There is another Bridgerton moment: she cleans his brow after he gets into a fist fight. He is soooo understanding. They talk of culture, art, books…they have so much in common. Through some shifty maneuvering, he proposes.  I guess they marry.  I guess, because we don’t really know.  Why is that, you may ask.  Because, my little Petunias, there is no epilogue.  We are left to assume that she will move with him to Persia, where she won’t have any problem with bullying, and prejudice. This story really needed an epilogue. Clean D-

12.   A Moonlight Kiss, by Ella Quinn.  https://www.ellaquinnauthor.com/
Not much to say about this one. The writing was rather choppy. We have a sea captain/commander/whatever. There is a captain and young boy/sailor who drown in the first chapters. Commander Octavius Trevor doesn’t like to write condolence letters…but let’s jump ahead and forget about the drowned people, and go to a party. Hey, all the guys need shore leave. Then we have Marcella Calder, who is descended from slaves. There is George, the villain, who threatens Marcella, then just sort of disappears onto the Island of Misplaced Villains. We have a bunch of lieutenants (can you say future heroes). Marcella and Octavius eat food and fall in love. Then he gives her a ring. Then he leaves and goes to England.  Three years later. Marcella goes to England to be with her sister. Evidently her sister has married into Octavius’ family. He is there ready to return to Marcella, but he can’t because his father is horrible. But then Marcella shows up, his family conspires, they eat a bunch of food, plan to marry. The end. No epilogue. Clean D-

13.   A Match Unmasked, by Erica Ridley. https://ericaridley.com/
This one has Kitty Stanley and her childhood sweetheart Nathaniel Baxter in it. They were in luv forever. He became scared, and ran off.  Kitty became angry with him. She could never, ever forgive him.  Then they meet again at the ball. The beginning was a slow start, and Kitty was a little irritating in her anger. But then they get locked in a room together by her conniving Godmother, and they finally talk. She is wearing a spoon mask and he is wearing a fork mask, and there is a wonderful tie in to the fork ran away with the spoon nursery rhyme. This story made me smile. Warm A-

14.  Lovers and Madmen, by Heather Snow. https://www.heathersnowbooks.com/
Another separation, this time for 11 years. Lord Edward Phillip Thomas George Walpole and Calliope have a past with a big misunderstanding. Then they go to the masquerade, and yearn for each other. We also have more Bridgerton moments, in this case it’s all about pretending. There isn’t too much excitement in this story. Of interest is the couple who threw the party. There is a chapter of them being a loving couple at the end of the story. I thought that scene was rather fun. I was puzzled as to why the scene wasn’t saved for the very end of the entire anthology.  It would have made a charming wrap-up. Warm C-

15. One Simple Kiss, by Sabrina York. http://sabrinayork.com/category/books/
There are a bunch of women named after flowers in this story. It was hard to keep track of which flower was our heroine. There was Violet, Lily, and Rose. Evidently Violet was in another story, and Lily has one to come…that left Rose. So, Rose was rewarded a short story, and her hero was Liam Mackinnon. This one was a standard tale of young people who grow up loving each other, a misunderstanding, and then getting over the misunderstanding. Warm/Hot - C

Overall. It took me a long time to get through this entire book of 986 pages. 15 authors contributed to the stories, and maintained the connecting thread of a masquerade party. As with all short story compilations, some are better than others. But, I did enjoy reading some of the stories, and there were some authors that are now on my radar.  

Bridgerton: all of these stories have a copyright of 2021, so I don’t know if some of these stories were written before or after Bridgerton hit Netflix. I say that because either there was some borrowing of scenes from the show, or Romanceland has some mighty standard set-ups.

Any Rogue Will Do by Bethany Bennett

February 9, 2021

Busy, busy, busy.

 

https://bethanybennettauthor.com/

It’s been awhile since I finished the book Any Rogue Will Do.  I’ve had other, more important things to do!!  Like skulking. Like watching Bridgerton for the 50th gazillion time! I bet I can quote Rege-Jean Page and Phoebe Dynevor verbatim by now. Yes, it’s a sad tale of obsession. I’m thinking about joining Bridgerton Anonymous. Anyway, back to my thoughts on Bethany Bennett’s debut novel, Any Rogue Will Do. I believe that, once again, I am in the minority of not liking a book as much as others do. For the most part, I believe this book was a decent first novel, with a few minor issues and one really big issue…at least for me: the heroine.

There are a lot of things going on in this book: a fake engagement, an indifferent father, an old scandal, a reformed drunk Scot, and more. Our heroine, Lady Charlotte Wentworth and our hero, Ethan Ridley, have a past. Seven years ago, he was a drunk, and she fell in love with him – I guess. Then he called her a Paper-doll Princess, and left after her father refused his offer of marriage. So, she became belligerent.  She had some anger issues with Ethan, even though it was her father who refused him. Anyway, she’s blue, she’s angry, and she’s mad. Now, the years have passed and Ethan has reentered Charlotte’s life, and he wants to make amends. Like any heroine worth her salt, she can’t let that happen. For Pete’s sake, the story would be over too soon for that.

In the convoluted story plot line, it seems that Charlotte and her father have made a deal with each other. He has given her a few months to find a husband of her choice. Her choice is a man who will let her live her life the way she wants. Yeah, that’s going to happen! Anyway, she wants to remain single and manage a little “estate” of her own. Her father has picked James Montague as her husband. Montague is a real peach of a man. He is a Snidely Whiplash kind of villain, real oily, a real snake in the grass. He needs Charlotte’s money, and he will do anything to get it. He starts by rehashing the old “paper-doll princess” scandal. It is at this point that our hero Ethan steps in. He has a Romanceland Plan. Ethan decides that a fake engagement will be just the thing to stifle the gossip. I found this an odd plan, especially since neither Ethan or Charlotte seemed to really care about the gossip. One minute they cared, the next they didn’t.

Paper-doll princess. I guess I’m going to have to look up a definition for paper-doll princess, because honestly, I didn’t get the negative connotation. Unless it has to do with someone being perceived as perfect. How would that be scandalous?  Having had a boatload of paper-dolls when I was young, I see nothing wrong with them, nor do I see anything wrong with being called one. Maybe paper-doll means wanting only money. Well, would being called that create a scandal?  Isn’t that what the families of the aristocracy were all about? Maybe, it indicates someone who is perfect, but hasn’t any brains. Would that create a scandal? I don’t think so. I suspect I’m missing the point of the term, and I’m really too busy to look it up. After all, I have Netflix to watch. So, I’ll just complain about it. But, I didn’t understand the intention of the terminology, and that was a distraction. And, that is my problem, but it also indicates a problem with the narrative. When slang is used, there should be words surrounding that term which give one a hint as to the intent. Oh dear! Did I do a skip read? I don’t know, I can’t remember! Oh well.

On the other hand, I did understand how being dumped publicly by a guy would be insulting, and scandalous. I could also see how smart society would enjoy every minute of Charlotte's downfall. I just don’t understand how society would have sided with a drunk, working class Scotsman against one of their own. The pieces didn’t fit.

I guess what bothered me about this story was that Charlotte worried about what others expected of her, then she didn’t. She wanted a life that would have been completely unacceptable for that time period, one of separation from society. But then she worried about what they would say, or what her incredibly horrible father would say. And by the way, how can a husband and wife love each other so much that they exclude their children? I’m not fond of that trope in Romance.

Bottom line: When a romance works for me, there is magic in the pages. When I look back on the romance couples that I love, they all have something in common. They have captured my attention. I become entranced by their story, and I want them to have their HEA. I remember the characters I love long after I put the book down. It didn’t happen with this story. While I think the author may be promising, for me, Charlotte and Ethan didn’t work. The story was too scattered, and I found it too easy to walk away from. I was disappointed in this one, but will probably give the second story in the series a chance. As Captain Taggart says: Never give up! Never Surrender!

 

Time and Place: Regency England

Sensuality: Warm/Hot

Goodbye 2020!!!!!!

2020…

”We starve-look
At one another
Short of breath
Walking proudly in our winter coats
Wearing smells from laboratories
Facing a dying nation
Of moving paper fantasy
Listening for the new told lies
With supreme visions of lonely tunes

Somewhere
Inside something there is a rush of
Greatness
Who knows what stands in front of
Our lives
I fashion my future on films in space
Silence
Tells me secretly
Everything

Manchester England England
Across the Atlantic Sea
Arms take your last embrace
And I'm a genius genius
I believe in God
And I believe that God believes in Claude
That's me, that's me, that's me
The rest is silence

We starve-look
At one another
Short of breath
Walking proudly in our winter coats
Wearing smells from laboratories
Facing a dying nation
Of moving paper fantasy
Listening for the new told lies
With supreme visions of lonely tunes
Singing
Our space songs on a spider web sitar
Life is around you and in you
Answer for Timothy Leary, dearie

Let the sunshine
Let the sunshine in
The sunshine in
Let the sunshine
Let the sunshine in
The sunshine in
Let the sunshine
Let the sunshine in
The sun shine in...” 

Hair… Gerome Ragni, James Rado, Galt MacDermot

2021
    
I think I can speak for almost everyone…I for one am glad to see the last of 2020. I only hope that sometime the coming year we are all able to stand together and cheer. I think what I’m most looking forward to is being in a crowd and smiling. I don’t think it matters too much what I’m smiling at, as long as we are doing it together. There’s just something about staring up at the skies and everyone going aaahhhhh.

As far as books, this was mostly a disappointing year for me. I kept looking for a new author to cheer me up, but alas, twas’ not to be. I found myself turning more and more to my old stand-by books.

Voices we have lost this year: Mary Higgins Clark, Sheila Connelly, Clive Cussler, Karen Harper, Donna Kaufman, Barbara Neely, Susan Sizemore, Carlos Ruiz Zafon.

Debut authors who have shown up on my radar: Sophie Cousens, Alexandria Bellefleur, Denise Williams, Elysia Whisler, Rosie Danan, Bethany Bennett, Jenny Bayliss,  Barb Curtis, Kristen McKanah, Jane Igharo, Rachel Givney, Chloe James, Krista Jensen, Brianne Moore, Annabelle Greene, Lily Menon, Fiona Knightley, Georgia Toffolo, Lizzie O’Hagan, Heidi Catherine, Marie Lipscomb, Krysta Fox, Jane Ver Mulm, Chelle Sloan,  Fiona Rivers, Lisa Bent, Tina Rischlynn, Kit Hawthorne, Juliana Wight, Lola West. Good luck to all of you.

2020 Outstanding List. As I mentioned earlier, this was a hard year for me when it came to finding that special book. I found myself turning more and more to my old beloved stories. Thanks to all you authors who brought a smile to my lips. And, thanks to all of you authors who have brought some brightness into our world.

2020 Outstanding (In no particular order):
1.    My Last Duchess, Eloisa James, 2020
2.    My Kind of Earl, Vivienne Lorret, 2020
3.    Beauty Tempts the Beast, by Lorraine Heath, 2020
4.    About a Rogue, by Caroline Linden, 2020
5.    A Dangerous Kind of Lady, by Mia Vincy, 2020
6.    Redeeming the Elusive Earl, by Virginia Heath, 2020
7.    Slightly Married, by Mary Balogh, 2003
8.    Slightly Scandalous, by Mary Balogh, 2003
9.    Slightly Dangerous, by Mary Balogh, 2004
10.   The Perfect Waltz, by Anne Gracie, 2005
11.    The Perfect Stranger, by Anne Gracie, 2006
12.    First Comes Scandal, by Julia Quinn, 2020
13.    Mr. Impossible, by Loretta Chase, 2005
14.    Last Nights Scandal, by Loretta Chase, 2010
15.    The Secret Mistress, by Mary Balogh, 2011
16.    The Christmas Bride, by Anne Gracie, 2020

Disappointing books of 2020. First of all, an author does not have to be a bad writer to appear on my list of disappointing books. Let’s remember who this is all about…me, me, me. These are my disappointing books. There could be all kinds of reasons why a book makes it to this list, and they are my reasons. Maybe a number of my hot buttons were activated. Maybe it was a book which didn’t stand up to the test of time. Maybe I’m just human, and what someone else loves I don’t. Of course, there could be a problem with the writing, but then again that’s all subjective. There could be a problem with the editing, or the narrative, but then again, it’s – repeat after me – all about me, me, me. This does not mean I have crossed a particular author off of my list, it’s just a particular book, at a particular time was not a winner.

2020 disappointments (in no particular order)
1.    Duke I’d like to F…,Sierra Simone, Joanna Shupe, Eva Leigh, Nicola Davidson, Adriana Herrera, 2020
2.    Ten Kisses to Scandal, Vivienne Lorret, 2018
3.    The Absolutely Positively Worst Man in England, Scotland, and Wales, by Anne Stuart, 2020
4.    Someone to Romance, by Mary Balogh, 2020
5.    A Kiss from a Rogue, by Elisa Braden, 2019
6.    Desperately Seeking a Scoundrel, by Elisa Braden, 2015
7.    The Madness of Viscount Atherbourn, by Elisa Braden, 2015
8.    When a Girl Loves an Earl, by Elisa Braden, 2015
9.    The Footman and I, by Valerie Bowman, 2020
10.   A Royal Kiss and Tell, by Julia London, 2020
11.    Splendid, by Julia Quinn, 1995
12.    Dancing at Midnight, by Julia Quinn, 1995
13.    How to Catch an Errant Earl, by Amy Rose Bennett, 2020
14.    Simply Unforgettable, 2005, Simply Love, 2006, Simply Magic, 2007, Simply Perfect, 2008 by Mary Balogh
15.    The Perfect Kiss, by Anne Gracie, 2007
16.    The Earl Not Taken, by A.S. Fenichel, 2020
17.    No Man’s Mistress, by Mary Balogh, 2001
18.    Anyone but a Duke, by Betina Krahn, 2020

On to my prestigious awards.
 
No More Wire Hangers, aka 2020 Mommie Dearest Award. 

You know, there always seems to be plenty of bad relatives hanging around in Romanceland. This award is given to alllll bad relatives, not just mothers. These bad relatives are lurking behind many pages, just waiting to make our heroine or hero miserable. In some cases, the hero can never luv another woman because of something his mother did. After all of these years, I’m not sure which one of these relatives I find the most disturbing. They can be oblivious fathers, conniving mothers, wastrel brothers, self-centered sisters, or spoiled cousins. It doesn’t matter, and usually their punishment is never enough. As much as I would like otherwise, there always seem to be bullying relatives just waiting behind that closed door.
 
My nominations for 2020:
1.    From Vivienne Lorret’s, My Kind of Earl, we have Jane’s parents. Jane is forced to do all the parenting due to the fact that she has a pair of narcissistic parents. It’s ok for these parents to have tons of children, then ignore them.
2.    Evie Dunmore’s father of the hero, from A Rogue of One’s Own. This guy is pretty much a monster. He threatens the hero, Tristin, with locking up Tristin’s mother in an asylum, if Tristin doesn’t’ do what he wants.
3.    The father from Caroline Linden’s, About a Rogue is a real bonehead. Yes, it’s possible for parents to be boneheads. This father treats his daughter horribly, and all the time all she wants is his affection. It’s pretty pathetic. This is a case where the father got off lightly.
4.    In Anne Gracie’s, Marry in Scarlet, has a manipulator mother to end all manipulators. And because of her, her son can never trust, believe, or luv a woman.
5.    Another father, who has waaay too much hold over his adult son in Julia Quinn’s, First Come Scandal.
6.    Oh no! Say it ain’t so! Every year since this series began, this mother has made my list. Yes, it’s Francesca, Lady Aldriss from Suzanne Enoch’s, Scot Under Covers. Yes, she’s still a horrible mother. She’s still blackmailing her sons into submission, and then wondering why they don’t like her. Not only does Francesca make it to our list, but the winner of this year’s Mommie Dearest comes from the same book.
7.    From Suzanne Enoch’s, Scot Under the Covers, the truly loathsome brother Mathew. Mathew actually sells his sister to a slimy toad. And, because of that, Mathew is the winner of the Mommie Dearest winner this year. Congratulations Mathew – you stink!

2020 Steve Morgan Bonehead Hero Award.

Ah yes, the hero we love to hate. He is usually an alpha male; he is jealous, possessive, controlling, obsessive, and arrogant. He can never forget his first love, he blames his horrible mother for his treatment of women, he’s always right, he calls his heroine Wren, Little One, Carrot Top, Squeal-pudding and Button Nose. He doesn’t wear any protection when he has sex; and he keeps a bottle of cream on a near-by night stand, because he doesn’t want to take the time. Yes, he is an all-around, self-centered jerk. He makes a practice of making women feel small. The Steve Morgan Bonehead is a creature who should have left this world in the 1970s, but I fear he is still lurking under the weeds.

My nominations for the 2020 Boneheads are:
1.    From Ten Kisses to Scandal, by Vivienne Lorret we have a much older man. While I will be honest, I am not fond of large age differences, sometimes in the hands of the right author I have over-looked it. But not in this case, because Nicholas is experienced in so many ways. It is just creepy how he dominates the heroine, and not just physically. He is so condescending, he might as well pat her on the head like a dog.  
2.    Raven, from My Kind of Earl, by Vivienne Lorret is an almost-bonehead. Yes! I can have almost boneheads if I want them. He chose the very last minutes to let his inner petulance loose and throw a fit.
3.    You can always depend on Anne Stuart to give us a bonehead hero, and she does in The Absolutely Positively Worst Man in England, Scotland and Wales. Let me introduce you to Christopher/Kit. He is pure bonehead hero material, even if there is a half-hearted-redemption at the end.
4.    In Mary Balogh’s, Someone to Romance, we have a bonehead who is an absentee landlord. There seems to be a lot of those in more recent books.  This one is Gabriel Thorne. He has been in America for thirteen years earning tons money, and ignoring the people who are struggling to make a living on his lands. He whines and complains about not wanting to stay in England during most of the book.
5.    The Madness of Viscount Atherbourn, by Elisa Braden introduces a revenge bonehead hero, Lucien. Lucien is not only a bonehead, but he has a Bonehead Hero Romanceland Plan. Both Lucien and his stupid plan suck. Lucien is not only vengeful, but he is a cruel, sadistic, wanker.
6.    Boo-hoo-whiners can be Bonehead heroes too. This one also happens to be royal, and is responsible for a DNF. From Julia London, A Royal Kiss and Tell, we have Prince Leopold, a kiss-my-butt-I’m-royal-bonehead.
7.    Let me introduce you to Colin, our winner. Colin is a character from Elisa Braden’s series Rescue from Ruin, and his book is Desperately Seeking a Scoundrel. Colin was a horrible person in every single book in the series. The more he showed up in the books, the deeper into the mud he sunk. Colin was just toooo much of a bonehead for any author to redeem.

Sidekicks, aka Secondary Characters, aka Supporting Cast of 2020.
Where would a book be without those wonderful secondary characters? There would be no one for our heroine or hero to talk to. There would be no hunky men in a series for us to wait for. There would not be any intelligent women with a purpose for us to cheer on. What would we do without all those scene stealers? This award recognizes the bad and the good secondary characters. These are the characters who caught my eye this year.

1.    Lorraine Heath’s Trewlove family has been around for a number of books, and Beauty Tempts the Beast is the last of them. And, in my opinion one of the best. Through this series, I have grown quite fond of Ettie Trewlove, and the foundation of love she created for all the children who found a home with her.
2.    Remember I said not all secondary characters are good. Sometimes we have irritating, interrupting characters who are having their own boring romance. And, that’s what happens in The Absolutely Positively Worst Man in England, Scotland and Wales, by Anne Stuart. Yes, every time we start getting some insight into our lead characters, along comes irritating Cecilia and her Bow Street Runner. Hey, Cecilia! We don’t care!
3.    Secondary character overload. We get to have a visit from every single Westcott there ever was, and ever will be, in Mary Balogh’s, Someone to Romance.
4.    The one good thing about Valerie Bowman’s, The Footman and I, was the friendship between the hero and his friends. But the great chemistry between the friends disappear when they get their own book.
5.    In Virginia Heath’s, Lilian and the Irresistible Duke, we are treated to a secondary character who is memorable …and, it’s not human. No, this secondary character is the glorious vision which is Rome. Ms. Heath changes Rome into a living, breathing experience which was a pleasure to read.
6.    It was a delightful flash-back, and it involved going back to when Anthony, Benedict, and Colin Bridgerton’s were still young boys. They were so very entertaining, and they brought a smile to my face in Julia Quinn’s, First Comes Scandal.
7.    The entire Bedwyn family in Mary Balogh’s Simply series. Every single book in the series as a plethora of Bedwyn’s showing up…don’t they have their own homes?
8.    When Mary Balogh gets it right, she gets it right. From Slightly Married, she gives us two wonderful children: Rebecca and David. The emotions were powerful, and they almost stole the show.
9.    Once again Mary Balogh turns out some great writing. And, once again it isn’t a secondary person, but this time it is an event – The Duke of Richmond’s ball before the battle of Waterloo. The fear of the upcoming battle is so vivid, you can smell it.
10.    My favorite secondary character this year was Bazzle, from Lisa Kleypas’ Chasing Casandra. This young street boy is so very charming. He is great fun. And, it isn’t long before he and his lice, are stealing the scenes.

The 2020 Romanceland Plan 

Allow me to introduce to you a brand-new award. Yes! I don’t know why it took me so long to realize that Plans in Romanceland don’t work, but it did. I thought to myself, “You know, it’s time to recognize these odd thinking moments by supposedly intelligent people.” There are certain warning signs to watch for when a Romanceland Plan is about to be born. Look out for a female disguised as a male, and she may be breaking into a house. She is probably breaking into the house of the man who ruined her sister; however, it turns out that she is mistaken and it’s his brother/uncle/cousin/friend’s house. But that doesn’t matter, because he also has a plan, he’s going to wreak revenge on her because she’s the sister of the man who ruined his sister/mother/cousin, and besides that, he just hates the heroine’s family. But then they announce that they are engaged, but it’s not really a real engagement! No! it’s a fake engagement! But in order to maintain the fake engagement, one of them has to dress up as a servant because they need to get the jewels that are hidden, and the father of the girl dressed as a boy will forgive her for not marrying first. Then they will have to sneak into the villain’s house and rescue allll the orphan’s, before they are sacrificed to the men in the Hellfire club. Sounds like a plan! Then the birds will sing, the squirrels will chatter, and the unicorns will skitter across the countryside. All will once again be well in Romanceland. 

And, here are some other worthy 2020 Romanceland plans:
1.    From Evie Dunmore’s, A Rogue of One’s Own, we have our hero Tristan’s plan to save his mother from an asylum, then ship her off to India…because she has friends there? Because she likes India? Because she asked to go there? Nope, none of those.
2.    Gabriel from Mary Balogh’s, Someone to Romance, has a plan. He plans to marry someone from a powerful family in order to regain his estate. Not sure how. He of course hasn’t been at his estate in years and years, and he doesn’t plan on staying, and he doesn’t plan on falling in love. So, the plan will probably work.
3.    The I-know-what-is-best-for-you plan by Elisa Braden’s heroine Augusta, from Anything but a Gentleman. Yes, she’s going to break into a gaming house and steal the “markers” of the creep who seduced her sister, then left her sister pregnant. Does she take into consideration that the guy is a real burp? No. Does she listen to her sister? Nah. Does she do smart things? Ha ha. Does she have long legs and red hair? Yep! That’s probably why her plan won’t work.
4.    From the same book, we have another plan. This one is from Sebastian. His plan is to scare Augustus by suggesting she become his mistress…I am speechless. We are talking about a hunky guy from a romance book, and being his mistress is supposed to be scary…Be afraid…be very afraid.
5.    Another book by Elisa Braden, The Madness of Viscount Atherbourn. Oh, my favorite kind of plan, the revenge plan. Yes, Lucien is mad, he is seeking revenge on the man he believes is responsible for the ruination of his sister. His plan is to seduce the sister of the man he hates, then create a scandal. Well, the seduction works, but the next day he proposes…so, how does that plan work again?
6.    From Valerie Bowman’s, the Footman and I, we have the disguise plan. Three spies/buddies/rakes disguise themselves as servants because…we don’t know why. It’s a bet, one of them is a spy, one of them is avoiding women…it’s a very confusing plan. It doesn’t make sense, but what it does do is get them in the house the same time the heroines are there.
7.    A normal plan, or as normal as Romanceland can allow. The plan from Anne Gracie’s, The Perfect Stranger. Nicolas will marry Faith and return her to England. Yep, that’s the plan. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? Well, they have to trek through the countryside of France to get to England. They succeed in getting to England. Then there is some kind of weird, paranormal gypsy who reaches their hand inside the hero’s body, pulls out a tumor, and saves him. The gypsy hand event wasn’t part of the plan, just weird.
8.    From Mary Balogh’s, Slightly Sinful, is a doozy of a plan. This plan involves a bunch of prostitutes, our innocent heroine, a crusty one-eyed sergeant, and a hero with amnesia. All of these people need to get some money…because they all have dreams. Well maybe not the guy with amnesia. Anyway, they all pretend to be someone else, so they can approach our heroine’s uncle and get some money from him. The sergeant becomes a valet, the prostitutes become cooks, servants, and a companion. The hero and heroine become pretend-husband and wife. It was all very convoluted…and it didn’t work!
9.    Another disguise plan! From The Perfect Kiss by Anne Gracie. Grace Merridew plans to dye her hair and pretend to be a servant. I’m not sure why she needed to dye her hair, but then most of the plan didn’t make sense. Anyway, Grace pretends to be a servant because her bestest friend Molly is being forced to marry Dominic. Dominic doesn’t want children, Molly does. So, Grace dresses up like a servant/maid to Molly so she can do something…not sure what. Except for cleaning the chamber pots, I’m not sure how Grace’s plan was supposed to work, especially when it is Grace who Dominic becomes interested in, not Molly.
10.    And the winner is…. Aden’s plan from Suzanne Enoch’s, Scot Under Covers. Yes, Aden has a Romanceland Plan, but it’s a secret!!! He is so arrogant; he doesn’t tell anyone what he’s doing. He has them doing things for him, but he never lets anyone in on the secret plan! Aarrgh! Congratulations on the secret plan! And, congratulations on winning the first Romanceland Plan

And now for the award you’ve all been waiting for. It’s like the Oscar for best picture isn’t it…sort of. Well, maybe not. Yes, yes, yes, it’s time for the 2020 Timothy Toad Award! It’s time to honor those bulges, protrusions, and tents in pants. Sometimes they are eye catching, and sometimes you just wonder how some things are still attached. How can some of those Toads still be in working order, and not shriveled by some disease?

Timothy Toad Award for 2020
1.    In Elisa Braden’s, The Truth about Cads and Dukes, we have a Timothy Toad who is completely out of control. Our mature, stiff-neck hero, just cannot control is wacky giant toad. We don’t know why he can’t control it, because we are not given too much insight into his brain. Not the toad’s brain, but the hero’s brain.
2.    Another Elisa Braden book. This time it’s The Madness of Viscount Atherbourn. This guy is a real bonehead. He’s arrogant, and he’s out for revenge. Lucien is a real piece of work, and his Timothy Toad must be too. No matter how badly Lucien treats our heroine, she is mesmerized by his magic flute. She just cannot get enough of the puffy, one-eye guy. Page after page of yes, no, yes, no, yes. No wonder Timothy was confused.
3.    See what happens when you glom. Yes, another Elisa Braden book is nominated for an award. This time it’s When a Girl Loves an Earl. We have a biggggg one! Yes, James is at least eight feet tall! Everything about him is big. His hands, feet, toes, fingers…and other appendages. Too bad the heroine wasn’t a better heroine, because this huge Timothy Toad was wasted.
4.    The lonely Mr. Toad from Valerie Bowman’s, The Footman and I.  Lucas’s Mr. Toad is the only thing in this book who was fully developed. I think he must have realized how boring everyone in the story was, because he kept trying to escape.
5.    Another oldie. From the 1996 Minx, by Julia Quinn. Dunford has no control over anything in this book, including his Timothy Toad. It was alllll very amusing.
6.    We have a very sensitive Mr. Toad from Slightly Sinful by Mary Balogh. He’s so sensitive he can recognize a virgin just by the slightest touch. For some reason, I don’t think these guys are all that sensitive.
7.    Beware of Bonehead Heroes with twitching Timothy Toads. Especially when they twitch at the sight of a woman who isn’t engaged to them. Welcome to a very dishonorable toad from The Perfect Kiss, by Anne Gracie
8.    And the winner is: All the Mr. Toads from The Arrangement, by Sylvia Day, Minerva Spencer, and Kristin Vayden. Sometimes there is just tooooo much mind-numbing activation of hippidy-hopping toads. Sometimes there are toooo many bananas peeled, too many oranges squeezed. There was so much whankee-woo in this book, there wasn’t a story. If we put choir robes on these guys, I bet they could sing. That would be a sight for sore eyes.

And, it’s over. It’s time to say get thee gone 2020. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out! Here’s hoping that 2021 will bring us a better year. My wish for this year is that we are all still here, and enjoying the books we love so much. It’s been a rough year, and I’m looking forward to being in a crowd, looking up at the sky and watching the stars together.

Someone to Romance by Mary Balogh

September 15, 2020

Time to take a nap

https://marybalogh.com/
Well, the Queen has done it again. She’s written a slow moving romance. The problem is, it’s so slow I started to nod off. Someone to Romance is part of Ms. Balogh’s Westcott series. I will be honest, this series has been all over the place. So far, there are eight books in this series. Out of those eight I liked three: Someone to Wed, Someone to Love, and Someone to Care. So, the percentage is a tad bit off.

Someone to Romance is Lady Jessica Archer and Gabriel Thorne’s story. If you have been following this story you may remember Jessica. She is/was the best friend of Lady Abigail Westcott. Jessica is not a very likeable person. She’s feeling blue because her bestest friend in the whole wide world is happily married. Yes, Jessica had planned on her and Abigail being spinsters and being together all of their life. How dare Abigail be happy with her man! Jessica is feeling sorry for herself. She sees the clock ticking away, she’s getting older, she’s twenty-five after all!!! Yikes! Since she can no longer roam the world with her spinster friend, she decides that she to will marry. She doesn’t necessarily care who she marries, but she just doesn’t want to be alone. Another case of depending on others to make you happy. It’s a real pity party.

Gabriel is also not a very likeable character. He is what one would call an absentee landlord. He’s been living in America for thirteen years. He’s been making loads of money, in the process he has also ignored what’s going on at his English estate. However, there is a fly in the ointment, his uncle Manley Rochford. You see, Gabriel is really the Earl of Lyndale, except everyone thinks he’s dead. Manley, his uncle, is going to have Gabriel declared dead, and claim the title himself. Gabriel’s uncle is a Snidely Whiplash kind of villain. Then one day he receives a letter from his aunt’s sister, Mary. She has been kicked out of her house on the Lyndale land by our villain, Manley. So after years of ignoring the people who depend on him, Gabriel decides to get off of his butt and help. He’s going to be sly about it and not let anyone know he’s back. There’s a good reason he is being shifty. He has to prove who he is. It won’t be easy because he’s changed a lot in the thirteen years. He will need to prove who he says he is. And he has a plan!

He is going to find an aristocratic bride. Someone who belongs to a powerful family. Someone who knows how to run an estate. His eyes fall on Jessica, the perfect person for the job. Now the story does a fast gear switch. When Gabriel suggests Jessica marry him, all of a sudden she wants romance. Now, she wants what Abigail has! Yes, she wants romance, and she wants to be romanced. Even though her original thoughts about marriage were cold, now she wants someone who doesn’t have an ulterior motive. Even though she’s not willing to give, she want’s someone to give to her. She was very selfish.

Gabriel’s idea of romance was interesting. While he may have no idea how to be romantic, he ends up being swoon worthy. He starts by sending her one rose every day. Who wouldn’t start to pay attention to something like that? While I thought Gabriel’s romantic technique was a winner, for me, both Gabriel and Jessica lack “couple” chemistry. Usually Ms. Balogh inundates her characters with thoughts, emotions, and slow burns. But they were strangely lacking in this book.

I think part of this was due to the fact that most of the Westcott’s put in an appearance. Now, that I’ve whined about the Westcott’s, I have to say, I did chuckle at Avery Archer, Duke of Netherby’s reason for disliking one of Jessica’s suitors: “He has too many teeth.” Brought a smile to my face.

Overall, Someone to Romance was very slow, and forgettable. It had a hero and heroine who were both unlikable. The story was just sort of bland. If you want to keep track of the Westcott family, then go ahead and read this one. But it’s really not all that exciting. 

 

Time/Place: Regency England

Sensuality: Bland

Anything but a Gentleman by Elisa Braden

 August 31, 2020

At last! A good story….mostly!

https://www.elisabraden.com/

Yes, finally Elisa Braden gave me a story I liked…a lot. Well she didn’t actually give it to me, I did buy it.

Anything but a Gentleman is the 8^th book in the Rescued from Ruin series. If you’ve read any of the other books in the series, you should be familiar with the leads, Sebastian Reaver and Augusta Widmore. Both of these characters were eye-catching secondary characters in those stories, and I will be honest, this was one of those times I had high expectations for these two characters when they had their own story. I was happy that Ms. Braden didn’t disappoint.

Sebastian is a Romanceland gambling establishment owner. Hence he’s rough around the edges, and at first glance, he seems to be pretty menacing. He is also someone it is never wise to cross. But, he is about to meet someone who doesn’t abide by his rules…Augusta Widmore.

Alert! Augusta is one of those Romanceland women. You know the ones I’m talking about! Those red-headed females with long legs! Oh no, not long legs!!! Not vibrant red-hair! Of course, she doesn’t know what a beauty she is, but I liked her too much to care. Was she a perfect heroine? Of course not. She had a number of qualities which I didn’t care for, the most important of these not being able to listen to her sister. But, I forgave her, eventually. It seems that her younger sister, Phoebe, is pregnant, and not married. The man responsible for is a cad, a real bounder, and he’s also a gambler. And, not a good gambler. He has left a lot of “markers” at Sebastian Reaver’s gambling establishment. Augusta has a plan! I’m sorry, my little Petunias, but heroine think up Romanceland plans too. Yes, she has a Romanceland plan, and it’s a doozy. She means to get those markers from Reever…somehow. She hasn’t really thought out the how. Anyway, once she has the markers, she plans on forcing the “cad” to marry her sister. There is so much wrong with this plan, I don’t even know what to say. But I will go ahead anyway.

One of the things I disliked about Augusta was her mind-set on forcing her beloved sister, Phoebe, into wedlock with the “cad/bounder/worthless creep.” Augusta is rather strong-willed, as Sebastian finds out. She needs to talk to him, he refuses. Ok, he refuses to talk to her, so she will find ways to get into his establishment, and force him to pay attention. She keeps breaking into his gambling house. He keeps kicking her out. At one point, even throwing her over his shoulders and tossing her out. Augusta does not give up.  Eventually, he comes up with a plan. His plan is to scare her into running away. He offers to give Augusta the markers if she will become his mistress. And, he waits for her to turn tail and run. He waits, and waits. Much to his surprise, she accepts.

Now, we get to watch the menacing Sebastian turn into a cuddly bear. I enjoyed the relationship between Sebastian and Augusta. There were misunderstandings, snappy dialogue, and an occasional chuckle. The only fly in the ointment was the sister, Phoebe and the secondary romance she becomes involved in.

I found the secondary romance between the weaker Phoebe and Sebastian’s partner Adam Shaw a distraction. I was never fond of Phoebe. She waited too long to find her voice. Adam Shaw was an incredible scene stealer and deserved a book of his own, and a heroine who wasn’t so wishy-washy. The secondary romance didn’t add anything to the overall voice of the book.

In conclusion. So far, this has been my favorite book in the Rescued from Ruin series. I thought Sebastian and Augusta made quite a delightful couple. I would have given this book a higher rating if not for the secondary romance. It was a bit of a distraction, and Adam deserved his own book. The other issue which bothered me was Augusta’s stubbornness in insisting her sister marry such a blackguard. She should have talked things over with Phoebe. Her assertion that she had all the answers was frustrating. Also, Phoebe could have grown a backbone sooner. But I do recommend this book.

Time/Place: Regency England

Sensuality: Tons

 

Devil is a Marquess by Elisa Braden

July 28, 2020
Hairy Armpit Guy!!

http://www.elisabraden.com 

I am about to do my digressing right away. How do I/me/myself select which books I read? Well, glad you asked. I go through a number of different thought processes. First, I have a rather large group of auto-buy authors from which to select. Of course, you must understand, that list of auto-buys have changed over the years. I have dropped some, and added others. My list is always evolving. That is why I am always on the lookout for new authors. Here is where my problem begins. I can no longer depend on my old sources…cause they are not there!!!!!

There have been many changes to the publishing world in the last few years. I realize in the glory days of publishing, numerous promising authors were lost in the shuffle to the top. It was hard to break into the publishing business. Maybe some authors did not have an agent, the right editor, the right cover letter…whatever the reason they were never published. Well, now we have self-publishing, and everyone can be an author…if that is what they want. However, here is the problem as I see it. Not everyone can write.  While I rejoice that everyone is tipping their toes into the writer pool, there are only so many books one can buy…and I buy mine. I like to own my books. While I have easy access to the library, I am more of an owner than a borrower.  So, what do I look for? Well, I will tell you my little Petunias. It all boils down to what I like and more importantly, what I do not like. There are certain “flags” I am on the lookout for, when selecting a “new” author to read. Here are a number of things I have grown leery of.  Covers. Yes, covers. I am aware of the old adage: never judge a book by its cover, blah, blah, blah. However, when one is looking at a cover which is badly drawn, has mediocre clip-art, or in the case of historical romance: a modern wedding dress/prom dress which does not in any way look historically accurate. So, yes I now judge a book by its cover. What a bad cover says to me is that someone does not care. A good cover should say to me that someone has spent time, and thought constructing artwork, which echoes what is inside.

Whine number two. I am leery of good reviews…tons of good reviews. I do not always trust them, especially when I see an author who has published 10 books in five years. Unless those books were laying under a bed for years, the swiftness of writing that many books in that short time period suggests to me that, something, somewhere has been overlooked. Maybe the editing is sloppy, or the author’s best friends are her/his critique group. It could be any number of things. In the rush to make money, be a best seller, and make that exclusive author list, character development suffers. I am a consumer; I purchase my books, so I do have concerns as to the money going out of my pocket. Therefore, if something about a book triggers one of my alarms, I do not buy it. Now on to The Devil is a Marquess.

The Devil is a Marquess, published in 2016, is part of a 10.5 book series. It also happened to have a couple of my triggers. Which is why in 2016, I did not read it. The cover bothered me. I am not necessarily fond of hairy armpits on book covers. Yes, I am aware that everyone has hairy armpits, but I am just not sure I like to see them staring at me from my Nook. I like to think of my heroes as not having too many bodily functions…except for one.  Then I found out that the author published 10.5 books in only five years. That is a lot of fast writing. Therefore, my alarms were going off. Then just recently, Delia and I were talking about heroes, and she recommended The Devil is a Marquess. She said she would be interested in what I thought about it. Now, I do not know why she did; because we never had a chance to discuss it…I think it was probably something nefarious, probably the hairy armpits. I suspect she wanted to see my reaction. So, I purchased the book and here is my reaction to it.

I am done digressing about armpits. The Devil is a Marquess is the fourth book in the Rescued from Ruin series by Elisa Braden. While Elisa Braden is not a polished author, she does have promise…she just needs to slow down, and tie up those ends. She needs to make sure that some of the actions of her characters make sense.

The hero of The Devil is a Marquess is Benjamin Chatham, the Marquess of Rutherford. He is a dissolute rake…surprise! He drinks too much! He is broke! He has debt collectors moving furniture out of his house! He has a horrible mother! He also has a terrible secret! His Timothy Toad does not have any diseases, but he should. The story opens with Chatham leaving the bed of the woman he just serviced…and I do not mean fixing her brakes. He also accepts payment for said services…still not brakes. Lilacs. He is getting a blinding headache from her lilac perfume. He’s seeing stars, he’s going to throw-up, pass out…he’s just not in good shape…his Timothy Toad may have been functioning, but not him. I suspect it is the lilac smell, I know nothing makes my head throb faster than my neighbor’s Lilac bush. He gets these blinding headaches a lot. It is never fully explained why he is getting headaches. Are these headaches due to migraines, or are they because he has a drinking problem? The symptoms could have been either. Author’s, I am not a doctor. If someone in a book has a physical problem, I like to have a little bit more clues as to their illness. I kept pondering whether they were migraines or alcohol abuse. Eventually, they clear up…until he loses his temper for no apparent reason later on in the book. The hero was not a nice guy. He said hateful, hurtful things to our heroine, and he did it deliberately. He was a hard man to like. Then we have the heroine.

Charlotte. I liked Charlotte, although I grow tired of tall redheaded women who do not know how stunning they are.  I have to ask…were short blonde-haired women in vogue during the 1800s? I do not know, I should probably look that up. I know pale skin, round faces, and rounded bodies were popular…but hair, I do not have a clue. But really, who could look away from a vibrant redhead? Anyway, Charlotte’s father forces Chatham and Charlotte into a marriage.  Neither one of them is too keen on the idea, nor do they necessarily like each other, but they have no choice. Soon after Chatham and Charlotte marry, they are off to Chatham’s run-down estate. Run-down is a mild term for Chatham’s country estate. The place is in shambles, there are rotten stairs, falling plaster, leaking roofs, tarnished brass, bird’s nest, spider webs, rot all over the place. There are weeds outside, humongous weeds, the land has been allowed to turn fallow, the out buildings are falling apart, and the people who once worked the land are no longer there. Plus, the giant stone fence is crumbling. What a mess. However, that is ok, because super-duper Charlotte and Chatham and two servants get it all in ship-shape condition in just a matter of weeks. I found my eyebrows raising at the amount of work four people could accomplish in such a short time. Two of those people had probably never ever seen a shovel or broom in their entire life. That little clean-up scene was a bit…silly. Obviously, the author has never experienced the joy of polishing a wooden floor in a 150 year-old house…and without the benefit of an electric floor polisher. 

You might think I did not like this book…well, it was a roller-coaster ride. I thought the hero was very immature, and at times downright mean. I also thought there should have been a bigger groveling scene, and the heroine forgave him too soon. There were moments of tenderness, and I would find myself enjoying how our couple were getting along. Then Mr. Bonehead hero would do something nasty, and I would be on the roller coaster again. I loved the heroine; she was a determined woman who knew what she wanted, I just wasn’t always sure why she would want the hero.

There was way toooo much whankey-roo-hoo. It was irritating, I am a strong believer that sex in books should be there to add to the story, not just to titillate, or let us know how many positions are available.

So, what am I saying? Well, I am saying I liked this book well enough to read the next one in the series. However, there needed to be more character development, less whankee-roo and an editor who asks…do you really want to do this? Overall, I think the author shows promise. Maybe with just a little more polish, she will become an auto-buy. We will see, because I did purchase all the books in the series – so, I will keep you informed. Here’s hoping.

Time/Place: Regency England
Sensuality:Hot/Warm

Holy Lemonade Ice!!! Upcoming Historical Romance!!

June 27, 2020
Authors with an asterisk*, I'm picking up! Release dates mostly between July 15, 2020 and August 14, 2020. For more Upcoming Releases that aren't historical see HEY DELIA!!

Series indicates a series, spin-off, sequel, trilogy, brother/sister, secret society/spies, good friends who attended Oxford/Eton, vampire/werewolf - anything that has something continuing - even if written 20 years ago. Anthology/novella/short stories could be an anthology or a bunch of books in one print or novella - one tiny book or an anthology with a bunch of novellas - could be a short stories by one author, could be short stories by multiple authors - could be - I'm getting a headache. Ebook, only sold electronically for now. Debut - congratulations!

By the way, it is not my fault if a publisher changes the release dates - just so you know, they do not consult me. Let me also add this warning - since I am now using different sources, I am finding that one person's genre isn't necessarily another persons - sorry if your book is in the wrong genre.

**Book by an author who is either new to me or has fallen off of my list and I might read.

Historical Romance

	Amy Jarecki https://amyjarecki.com/ Highland Warlords The King's Outlaws series August 11
	Anna Harrington* http://www.annaharringtonbooks.com/ Winner Takes All July 20, novella
	Beverley Oakley http://www.beverleyoakley.com/ The Countess and the Cavalier Hearts in Hiding series July 25
	Carol Townend http://caroltownend.co.uk/ The Warrior's Princess Prize Princesses of the Alhambra series July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Cheryl Holt http://cherylholt.com/ Someone to Love Lost Girls Trilogy series August 11
	Christine Merrill http://www.christine-merrill.com Vows to Save Her Reputation July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Danelle Harmon http://www.danelleharmon.com My Saving Grace Heroes of the Sea series July 28
	Darcy Burke http://www.darcyburke.com A Secret Surrender The Pretenders series August 11
	Eva Leigh* http://evaleighauthor.com Would I Lie to the Duke Union of the Rakes series July 28 (according to author’s website – we’ll see)
	Eva Shepherd https://www.evashepherd.com/ Aspirations of a Lady's Maid July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Julia Justiss* http://www.juliajustiss.com/ The Enticing of Miss Standish The Cinderella Spinsters series July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Kaitlin O'Riley** http://www.kaitlinoriley.com/ The Unexpected Heiress Hamilton Cousins series July 28
	Karen Ranney http://karenranney.com My Highland Rogue Highland Flings series July 28
	Kathryn Le Veque http://www.kathrynleveque.com Lord of the Sky Executioner Knights series July 23
	Madeline Martin http://www.MadelineMartin.com How to Start a Scandal July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Mary Jo Putney http://www.maryjoputney.com/ Once Dishonored Rogues Redeemed series July 28
	Michelle Willingham http://www.michellewillingham.com The Highlander and the Wallflower Untamed Highlanders series July 21 – paperback, August 1 - ebook
	Olivia Waite http://www.oliviawaite.com The Care and Feeding of a Waspish Widow Feminine Pursuits series July 28
	Patricia Rice http://www.patriciarice.com/ An Illusion of Love School of Magic series July 21
	Stephanie Laurens http://www.stephanielaurens.com/ The Obsessions of Lord Godfrey Cavanaugh Cavanaugh's series July 16
	Valerie Bowman* http://www.ValerieBowmanBooks.com Duke Looks Like a Groomsman The Footmen's Club series July 28

Historical Fiction

	Diana Giovinazzo http://www.dianagiovinazzo.com The Woman in Red August 4
	Ellen Feldman http://www.ellenfeldman.com/ Paris Never Leaves You August 4
	Ellen Marie Wiseman https://ellenmariewiseman.com/ The Orphan Collector July 28
	Emma Donoghue http://www.emmadonoghue.com/ The Pull of the Stars July 21
	Finola Austin https://www.finolaaustin.com Bronte's Mistress August 4
	Kathleen Rooney http://www.kathleenrooney.com/ Cher Ami and Major Whittlesey August 11
	Kristin Harmel http://kristinharmel.com/ The Book of Lost Names July 21
	Lily Woodhouse, aka Stephanie Johnson Jarulan by the River July 28
	Stephen P. Kiernan http://www.stephenpkiernan.com Universe of Two August 4