What an Earl Wants by Kasey Michaels

December 3, 2012
"The pellet with the poison... the pellet with the poison is in the vessel with the pestle, the chalice from the palace has the true that is brew. Eh... brew that is tru- The pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle, the chalice from the palace has the true that is brew. Eh, eh, brew that is true. Eh. The chestle with the pal- eh, eh, palace with the...

The pestle with t... the pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle, the palace from the chalice has the brew that is blue. Eh, no... The pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle. The cha- eh, the pellet with the plip... the pellet with the poisle's in the vessel with the plazzle. Eh, the plazzle with the vlessle. Eh, the the bless... The vessel with the plozle is the plazzle with the..."
The Court Jester

I'm so confused!!!  Well, I finally finished What an Earl Wants by Kasey Michaels and I have to ask.  Sincerely ask.  What the (insert expletive here) did I just read.  What's going on?  And, by the way ked-does, there may be spoilers ahead - who knows, I'm so confused, I don't know what I may be giving away.

Ok, so we have Gideon, our hero, and Jessica, our heroine.  So far, so good.  We also have the beginning of a new series about the Redgrave family, Gideon being the eldest in the group.  Future books will be about Max, who wears glasses with blue-tinted lenses - I don't know why, maybe they're x-ray glasses and he's able to see through things; Val, the nice one who likes dogs, and cats and fluffy things, which I'm sure he'll run into in his own book; Kate, the beautiful headstrong sister who also has all the ear marks of an energetic nose-sticker-in-er aka TSTL heroine; and lastly, Trixie, the wise-cracking grandmother.  She's too old for her own book, cause you know Romanceland is not ready for sex scenes between a 70 year old woman and 20 year old men.

There is also a mystery-who's murdering all the people?  There are people dropping like flies all over the place.  We suspect the father of Jessica was murdered and the step-mother, and Lord Who's It and Lord What's It.  And it all revolves around the secret hellfire society founded by Gideon's grandfather - passed down to his father.  But some one's killing the old members, no wait someone's killing the new members, someone's going to kill Jessica because she knows - what?  I don't know what she knows.  We must protect her half-brother Adam because he's a son of a member of the secret society - no wait - cancel that - the new society isn't doing that any more.  And we know that because?  I don't know!  And, Trixie thinks there are secret books and journals that have names of the old secret society people.  But, wait we don't care about them anymore because there are new secret society people with new secret names.  There are guys that wear black masks and rose lapel pins and have dark mysterious eyes or strikingly blue eyes.

Have your eyes glazed over yet?  Is there a ringing in your ears?  Well wait.  I did mention the red rose pin, didn't I?  You see, Gideon wore the lapel pin (which was his father's) because he wanted the people in the secret society to know he knew, but then he had second thoughts.  Especially after he met Jessica and had forced seduction sex with her and married her, then had more gratuitous sex with her.  Then, he found out there was a new secret society, and wearing the rose pin wasn't such a good idea.  So, he decided to just go hide in the country with Jessica where they could have more sex and be safe.  In fact, Trixie, Adam and Richard all go hide in the country, because the guy with the blue eyes might know who Jessica and Richard really are.  I suspect the guy with the blue eyes is going to be a future hero, even though he was wearing a French uniform when Jessica and Richard first saw him.  Wait - wait...who's Richard?  Well, Richard is Jessica's partner in an illegal gambling house that she has established in her neighborhood.  They of course must shut the gambling house down when they go hide in the country.  But, that's ok because Jessica was worried that running a gambling house might ruin her standing in society and Almack's if anyone found out she was running one.  Seriously, Jessica.  You don't think that your neighbors might be suspicious of men coming and going to and from your house at all hours of the night?  I know the light bulb would go off in my head.  And then there's Napoleon, traitors and spies.  Groan.

Someone stop the merry-go-round, I want to get off.

This book could have been so much better if it had just been just a romance or if the mystery wasn't' so convoluted.  There were so many unfinished sentences, things hinted at and left unsaid.  I felt as if I was supposed to know things and I was failing miserably.  Normally, I am a big fan of Kasey Michaels.  She has been one of my auto-buys, even when she went by the name of Michelle Kasey.  There are some wonderful gems in her body of work.  However, this one was a disappointment and didn't live up to the expectations I have of Ms. Kasey.

Time/Place: Regency England
Sensuality rating: Hot


Anonymous said...

I got as far as p. 96, immediately after the first sex scene, after which Gideon asks himself what happened in there. I, as you obviously did, wondered too--so I tossed the book aside. dick

SidneyKay said...

Dick: it only got better.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful! ROFL! dick